Sunday, January 25, 2009

chris made me go bowling and get hit on by drunk rednecks

my neighbor Chris (whom I quite like) asked me to go out bowling with her, even after my long ass day at the waterpark i said sure, lets go was moonlight bowling which started at 11pm...we got dinner at la estacion before hand and then went bowling...all is good and one irish coffee later i am perked up a bit...a few frames in we notice these horribly creepy guys just standing behind and to the side of our lane staring at us..

chris goes on to describe how whenever she goes out she ALWAYS gets hit on by losers or drunks, even when she is with Dave (her husband).

and about 6 sets later the very hot Goth waitress comes over and says something to Chris as I am bowling yet another gutterbal/spare set.

I ask Chris whats up, she said "i told you so, the waitress said those guys want to buy us a drink!"

I said, "I am pretty sure they want to buy you a drink and feel they have to buy your friend one too."

Chris is tiny, thin, blonde and quite cute; for those who know me, I haven't been cute since sometime in the mid 90s.

Chris tells the waitress no and the waitress says "good call."

we keep bowling...

2 sets later drunk #1 comes over and asks me "can we buy you drinks."

"no im pretty sure we're ok, thanks."

3 frames later drunk #2 comes over and repeats process

"nope, we are all good."

then i bowl and the 1st drunk guy comes over and explains he is from the south, his friend likes chris blah blah.

nope, were good, thanks buh-bye.

then chris goes to bowl and the guy walks over again,
i lead off with "so we are back to the drink thing again huh?"

"awww dont be like that, why cant we buy you drinks?"

"because i dont think our two husbands, 5 kids, 1 dog, 1 cat and 2 mortgages would like us having a drink from you."

so this pretty much caps it off for us and the guys still stood behind us staring all night. chris thought we might have to ask for an escort out since they really couldnt take a hint...we leave about 1:45am and as we are sitting in the van (you know, the large minivan with carseats and cheerios on the floor and blankies) waiting to get warm we see drunk #1 being tossed out of the bowling alley by 4 bouncers.

and hes yelling about something and chris and I are just dying.

now after an irish coffee and a pepsi, I am too wired to sleep.

my kids will be awake in 4 hours.