sun

today is sunny at 60, once all kids awake its an outside weekend!
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Hey There Delilah - Plain White T's

i love this song.

Duke Sucks

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the long story with no end

So lately (which should be no surprise to many of my loyal followers out there) I have been dealing with a relationship breakup between two friends. Its been kind of tricky (?) because I was friends with one person 1st and then became friends with the 2nd person as a direct result of the relationship problems with the 1st person, which in and of itself is a bit queer.... not uncomfortable as far as situations go, but just queer in the fact that at any one time you can be sympathizing with person A's situation and also talking to person B about the same thing but with a different bent...Its slightly mental in the fact that you can be saying to someone "yes, I totally agree that wearing green pants was a horrible idea" and then saying to the pants wearer "I understand that it is your right to wear green pants if you want." Some days I feel like I'm talking outta both sides of my ass and hoping that you don't upset either person-because you like them both separately as people and wouldn't want to lose either as a friend.

Its led me back to remembering the two life shattering breakups in my existence, you know, the ones that really mattered-not the piddly date a guy for two weeks and then move on crap, but the date someone for years and all of a sudden it goes goat break ups. I figure that women handle break ups in the following ways: the first bad breakup, being that it is your first bad breakup you pretty much handle by going all off the rails. I have had this breakup...This breakup entails you crying for hours at a time, sleeping for 18+ a day (cause you cant be sad when you are asleep), losing massive amounts of weight (twofold, you cant eat because you are depressed and the only thing in life you can control is what and when you eat so you just don’t.... the plus is I fucking rocked the body after the heartbreak diet...ah earth shattering depression & 130 lbs or normalcy and plumpness...) you also go into the mental state of a stalker, you pretty much become obsessed with your ex, what they are doing, who with, when, how, what they wore that day blah blah blah...I remember in high school being manically obsessed with what my ex was wearing (No idea why) and went loopy loo if a new shirt appeared on him and went off the deep end trying to figure out did some new girl buy it, did his mom, can I get one just like it etc? so lame....so so lame.

Oh and dear god, the music! Every song on the radio was about you and your ex’s relationship in some minute form…To this day I am unable to hear Neil Young without being physically Ill. also certain songs by Pearl Jam, Cracker, Soul Asylum…hell basically anything from 1994-1995 I have to turn off the radio it makes me morose and I pretty much realize that whole time period was a horrible waste…. It’s amazing when you are in the middle of your self-absorption breakup phase. you can find “meaning” in fucking any song that makes you think about your ex…fucking I dunno, “Holiday in Cambodia” can make you weep…”oh we used to like Chinese food, china is close to Cambodia…oh my god I LOOOOOOOVE him” (cue crying jag).

plus then you pretty much are mandated to tell your breakup story to everyone you know, everyone you meet, over and over again without stopping, your breakup story is the Jesus prayer of your life. I have literally shoeboxes FULL of notes passed back and forth between classes to my (ex) friend Damon going over every minute detail of our (me and the ex) relationship and breakup and subsequent actions on a daily basis. If I had to read all those now, I think I would die of embarrassment. But you are rain-fucking-man about your breakup “yep, we were so happy, wapner on at 4…so happy…so happy blah”...100% of your energy is focused on this guy.....and another 100% of your energy is focused on "how we can get back together because I totally love him and we are meant for each other and will get married and have babies (please someone shoot me in the head) and and and...ad infitum."

You also spend a lot of time thinking of ways to get crappy ex boyfriend's (because he was so so crappy, how did I want to get back together with a guy that tried to beat the hell outta me?)/and everyone else’s attention...There is the mandatory "I think I may be pregnant" scare, well that only works once...then you move on to the "I am gonna kill myself" scare which is usually in the oh so subtitle form of "I cant live without you, I'm gonna slit my wrists unless we can be together etc..." this also doesn’t work more than once and will get you dumped in psychological counseling......Then you go through various attention getting phases which include, but are not limited to: wearing all black, wearing sunglasses in class, not talking, talking a lot, drinking black coffee, writing page upon page of morose Eddie Vedder poetry, taking “strategic” sick days after fights (which is to reinforce the attention getting “I'm gonna kill myself” gambit)

By this point (which is when you finally are forced into counseling) you have become sick of the story and sick of yourself. I didn’t even want to explain the whole story to the counselor because I couldn’t stand it anymore. I was explaining this to someone the other day, we were having a "bad breakups of our lives" discussion...I said that now the bad breakup story bores me to tears and having to retell the whole story makes me want to bash my head against a wall...I am so so over the story...now don’t get me wrong..the level of my insanity from about Oct 94 through May of 95 is the stuff of legend and makes for a great retelling to a new audience....however...after about 3 years past, I realized that what I assumed was the worst breakup of my life, this person meant so much to me, I loved him so much-blah blah...was really nothing more than me throwing what amounted to the WORLDS LARGEST TEMPER TANTRUM. I was simply acting the way I did, NOT because I loved this person (which in retrospect, I really didn’t love him in a healthy way) or that he was the best man for me (he wasn’t) but because I wasn’t getting what I (Thought) I wanted. All the drama and crap I put my friends and family and hell, even him (the scumbag) through were all because I was acting like a chick on MTV's my super sweet 16 "I will hate you forever daddy if you don’t by me a Mercedes for my birthday." Spoiled and stupid. This realization took many years to come to....

I don’t feel like I could be held to blame for my actions. It’s was my first breakup and I think everyone (ok, I speak for chicks, cause Imp not a guy) reacts on emotion the 1st time it happens to you. Its because you don’t know any other way to behave and frankly, you don’t want to behave any other way but as a being of pure emotion...yer fucking Phoenix in X-Men, just a being of absolute rage and pain and god knows what else...

That experience was important for me because of two things:

1. I could handle the next breakup completely differently (because what I tried the 1st time was clearly ineffective and the def. of insanity (as we all know) is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result)

2. as a direct result of this break up I started dating dale...which I hope you would agree was a good call all around...

that being said the 2nd way you can handle a break up is: THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE OF #1..which shall be detailed tomorrow children, I’m sick and tired tonite.

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brilliant

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ouch!

Today was free coffee day at starbucks..'mo and I went to get a cup around 10am...good was it was free..bad was it was the Verona Blend and I dont like super strong coffee. The tourney starts today and like I said to Ryan, I fucking love the NCAA tourney and I dont even like college sports. Wish we would be able to stream the games here at work, stupid internet blocking.

I am a bit wenchy about dales computer, Ive been trying to convert movies and the damn program we are using has been hosing itself and not ripping the movies...I tried to do a movie 4 times and it hosed the program....plus I turned off Dale's computer last night and didnt realize it had his Zen attached so he was mad at me this morning. Sorry about that.....

Malinda's lice alarm turned out to be cuscus in her hair for dinner..I'm glad I bought 20.00 worth of lice crap for indian cream of wheat.

and i have 2nd degree burns on my hand from spilling my soup on it!

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final girls

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girls 3

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more girls

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girls

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Eyes

its a sad day, but at least its warm outside..

so today I could go on a long and twisted rant about whats going on in my life....the problem is what is going on in my life is a whole lot of nuthin' (malinda still has strep, Owen bit someone, Mya has speech today, dale stayed home sick {feel better soon babe} cancer girl and poop girl didnt come to work today yadda yadda) the main "problem" is that the things going on in my life are really the things going on in 2 other friends lives....

I don't really want to get into what is up with that, or who that all is...cause its really all their business...I can say that its really hard to be friends with two people who are in the middle of a breakup...they never do movies in hollywood about the "buddies" who have to navigate the emotional mindfield of the breakup war. On the one hand, you want to be supportive to both people and not take sides (nearly impossible) or make judgements about behaviors and actions (once again, not within the realm of human possibility) and on the other hand, you do want to take a side, give a unfiltered opinion, and say "yep, you are so so right, screw that guy/girl"---its only human nature you have to want to root for someone or something, i guess...

anyways, the last time i was in a similar situation like this, we lost 5 good friends and gained a godmother for our son...at the end of the day and knowing now what i knew then, it was the best thing ever to pick that side...it turned out the friends we thought were true were false and that the person who was totally marginalized and treated like shit was the gem. It doesnt really relate to the current state of the world, but at least its something to keep in mind.

I think I am (like many people) a firm believer in experience teaching you what you need to know....the goal of your experiences are to recognize patterns in the universe, to know how to react to certain situations, and to not make the same mistakes again and to help others avoid the same pitfalls you fell into..

I guess the main problem I have today (which has been a problem for weeks now) is that because i've BTDT I can see the patterns and predict with alarming and depressing accuracy whats going to happen next. Its odd because on the one hand you can say to someone "oh so you are at THIS step in your process...well lucky you, you have THIS crap to look forward to next" or "i really wouldnt do that, its gonna come back to bite you in the ass" but on the other hand, you totally dont want to say that, because you dont want to impact their decision making by suggesting something that may be a self fullfilling prophescy and inevitable....You can't save people from their decisions...and it doesnt matter if you tell them, that i have been there, I so understand and I can tell you that if you do this, you will hate yourself 2-3-4 years down the road...then you are supressing someone elses learning experience...it just sucks overall because I think most human beings have a natural need to spare their loved ones pain. Its why if we could as parents, we'd wrap out kids up in cotton batting for the 1st 18 years of their lives to protect them from the world....right now there are a few people out there that I wish i could place in deep freeze and move them forward a few years and just bypass the angish and pain and etc...that seems to be coming their ways...

sigh.....anyways, you guys out there (and i know you will eventually read this) be good to yourselves right now...you know I feel greatly for you both.

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lame ass exuses

So how many people were late to your work today because of the excuse "oh, i forgot to set my clocks ahead." This is the biggest bullshit excuse ever. As Tom said "so you went through a whole frickin day yesterday wondering why your TV shows were all messed up? Do you live under a rock?" Methinks people need to stop drinking themselves blotto everyday and use the fact that "yeah, im late because I am an alcoholic" instead, at least thats honest AND since you are an alcoholic you have a disease and they can't fire you or else they are discriminating against you...

Also not in today, cancer lady...excuse? Its a day that ends in "y." Seriously, its gone beyond pathetic to expected. I expect her to not be in every day. This month she has been here 3 days... only 15 more working days to go...place your bets....I got 8 days total she will be in this month...

Thanks to Andrea for that new lip gloss, its da bomb....and I am not a lip gloss girl..suddenly I am addicted. Expect a care package down there soon from me....

It was slightly funny, when i told the backup receptionist that I will take my coworkers calls (as per usual) she said "doesnt she ever come to work? why dont they fire her already?" This provided me with a chuckle and I said "why would they fire her?" and walked away. Its odd, they fire people here for the smallest thing, the stupidest reason....or for no reason at all....or because they need to send a "message" to everyone else (which never seems to give much more than, "why did they fire that guy?")

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for sale: 2 girls, cheep, inquire within

BUY ONE GET ONE FREE! FOR SALE: 2 GIRLS, AGE 3 1/2, BLOND AND BRUNETTE.
YOU GET: 2 3 1/2 YEAR OLDS WHO DONT WANT TO GO TO BED...THE JOYS OF CLEANING UP AN ENTIRE POTTED PLANT + DIRT FOR 60 MINUTES....NOT JUST ANY DIRT, MOIST DIRT...DIRT WILL BE ALL OVER ENTIRE ROOM, ALL OVER ENTIRE BED(S), ALL OVER ENTIRE WALLS, CABINETS, DRESSERS, CHILDREN, BEDDING AND MOST ESPECIALLY, THE OFF WHITE CARPETING.
YOU WILL GET THE JOY OF CALLING YOUR MOTHER AT 7:30 AT NIGHT TO BRING OVER DIRT DEVILS, VACUUM HOSES, RAGS & LABOR TO CLEAN UP SAID MESS.
YOU WILL GET TWO CHILDREN WHO ARE CRYING BECAUSE MOMMY TOOK AWAY ALL EXTRA BLANKETS, PILLOWS, STUFFED ANIMALS & THE PRIVLEDGE OF GOING TO THE ZOO WITH GRANDMA AND GRANDPA TOMORROW....
WHICH WONT BE A BIG DEAL BECAUSE YOU ARE GOING TO BUY MY KIDS.
*NOT FOR SALE* THE 2 YEAR OLD ASLEEP IN HIS BED AS THE ENTIRE EVENT WENT DOWN. HE IS A FUCKING ANGEL.

*ALSO NOT FOR SALE* THE LARGE VODKA CRANBERRY MOMMY IS HAVING TO TAKE THE EDGE OFF.

*COST FOR SAID CHILDREN:* ONE WOODEN NICKEL (AND YOU WILL BE OVERPAYING)

I ACTUALLY CHOSE TO PROCREATE, WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING?

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friday hurts my jaw

root canals do not hurt...they numb ya up (im still numb 5 hours later) and give ya the gas (which i think would make everyone really happy if we could suck that down all day) and all, but now i cant really open my mouth and i think i keep biting my cheek...i dunno...i have a feeling the pain will start soon...i feel slightly shitty so i am not even going to my twins club meeting tonight.....blah..

hi to andrea as she flys back to atlanta from her week long vay-k up here in the north...thanks again for dinner....

hi also to ryan...hope you have a nice weekend, seriously, try the zoo down there...

anyways...this weekend i am working a bit tomorrow am....we are heading to the zoo ourselves, i have to hit oconomowoc a bit for some cross stitch stuff and i know i need to clean.



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happy hump day!

So good news about my coworker, Wendy...her surgery went good, she is off her ventilator and she should be up and walking around perhaps as soon as tomorrow. So anyone that wants to send good thoughts Wendy's way, that would be nice...Thankfully they also got a temp in to help do her job...since Wendy and one other guy are our only skip tracers, they are, and this is putting in lightly, unbelievably overwhelmed.

Today I have to drive into Menomonee Falls to get the girls, here is hoping they took a nap today. Tonight I am at a loss for dinner. Last night we made do with random left overs, which seemed to work OK...tonight I may hit the store after work and get some Tilapia and make baked fish packets..But thats only if I feel really inspired...it may end up a Spagetti O's + more random left overs night...you just never know.

Watched Gilmore Girls (and I think by now I'm just watching because I have been doing that for 8 yrs) and House. House just kicked ass...Besides the fact that I have a jones for Hugh Laurie and a fundemental dislike of Dave Matthews...that all canceled itself out as it was just a wonderfully written episode. I can't believe they pull it for American Freaking Idol. I also caught that show last night, man do those guys suck.

I have been watching faithfully my Nero Wolfe episodes while here at work...its unreal how easy it is to work and watch TV at the same time. I feel I perfected this art while working at home for GE...man do I miss working from home. I do have nice fresh daffodils on my desk thanks to some cancer fundraiser or something, so thats a plus...except they don't smell especially good, but the yellow has been cheering me up so I can state that I am a happier person today than I was yesterday, thats something I guess.

I'm trying to make Andrea a mix CD she asked for...but I said I was in a sad/mellow music mode and didnt want to bring her down (man). But since she gave the OK I have been realizing that even though I have 5000 songs on the ipod, i'd say 4500 of them are depressing with only 250 happy songs and the rest is just kids music. No wonder I am in a shit mood if all I listen to is depressing crap. I keep looking around for my notebook filled with Eddie Vedder poetry in my tastefully distressed backpack...Hopefully I can find 18 songs and put them on CD before I see her tomorrow for sushi. (which no matter how good it is, won't be as amazing as Nobu or Morrimoto's)

Hi to Ryan...sorry I havent talked with you much this week....hope work has been bearable.

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crabtackular day

So last night I had one of those eff'd up dreams where you dream about someone you havent seen in years and you wake up really disturbed for dreaming about them in the first place. In this case it was a former friend who I dont think I have spoken to in over 5 years or so. It was disturbing becase he was so very pissed off at me in the dream and I remember being really afraid for myself in the dream and waking up all disoriented. Bah, its going to screw with my whole day.

On an even more disturbing note, a girl I work with (and like a lot) was rushed to the hospital Monday. She tore her aorta (!) and was in emergency surgery for 8 1/2 hours and then knocked out for 12 hours....we have not heard yet if she is doing ok (although we know she is still alive) or what the prognosis is. Its unbelieveable! I guess her mother told Sally that this happening is one of those things where if she had waited another hour or two to get to the hospital she would have dropped dead. That is just unreal. This brings up my other coworker who was out of work for 3 weeks because she bruised her leg and it hurt. I am not making this up. I got to see said bruise yesterday and although I didnt say anything to her face, I thought to myself, I have worse bruises on my body NOW from living daily life and having really thin blood and being really accident prone. Hell, the bruise I had on my leg from dropping the case of water on it was worse than what this person has now (my leg still hurts a month and a half later from that one). Now I came to work and sat on my ass doing my job with my boo-boo leg, somehow coworker of the year couldnt come to work (but god knows she could go to the bar every night for 6+ hours and drink...and go to concerts....and parties...) because her leg hurt. It boggles the mind. What boggles it even more, she came back after 3 weeks of being off WITH NO DOCTORS EXCUSE! Can you believe that? Does it cause you to see fractals and dots before your eyes? I certainly feel like I must be trippin on LSD. My god. (and of course she is running "late" this morning and called in to let us know that....thanks.)

Since I seem to be on a pissy rant, inaction and passing the buck-isms are also driving me up crazy creek this past week or so. It boggles my mind how many people try to pass the responsibility for decisions off to someone else so that they dont have to own up to anything. It's beyond frustrating when you have a person or a group that just wants to sit on their hands and look at you with that nice open and vague expression waiting for you to say "yes, I think you should wear the red dress...mmm hmnm, fantastic choice." Then 10 minutes later you get reamed out because "wasnt it obvious to you that the blue dress was the right answer?" well what the frak? If you knew the answer, why didnt you just do it yourself and not involve me in your process. Or what is even better is when you have two people playing off of you to get the other person to budge. "Oh well Mary said that we should just delete all those codes." then "Well didnt you say we should do that? I mean, it was obvious to me that deleting those was a really bad idea, but....since you said we should..." Christ, I could just pound my head into the sand...You either have to listen to someones idea or someones advise and let the chips fall where they may, or you have to shit or get off the pot and make your own decision-then freaking tell me what you decided. It would be nice if, somedays, the whole world could grow up and act their ages for once.

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hooray trish!

This is my beautiful Yoga teacher Trish and her cute husband John doing Yoga on the cover of M magazine. Rock on Trish!
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friday

so I have been watching the 1st season of Extras on my Ipod while I'm slogging away at work...Man do I love that brittsh comedy. I have been laughing so hard here at my desk that my coworkers are asking what's so funny...Now I switched over to "Chasing Amy" (also NSFW because of the laugh-out-loudy-ness) and then some Nero Wolfe episodes. This week has been pretty draining, it's done nothing but snow, then yesterday snow + rain...this morning it was impossible to shovel because the ice was under the snow and what you didnt slip on, you couldnt shovel...it was pretty nightmareish.

The car (mine) is at my wheel guy today. Getting new bearing in wheel (there goes 300.00 down the tube) and the tires rotated. Tomorrow is all about the cat going to the vet and an oil change for the other car...I'm also thinking we should maybe it a movie with the kids? Then again, Andrea just emailed me and thinks we can hang out tomorrow...I may do that, no idea what or when...

The bummer now is that they have blocked Myspace from work so we can't even look at it...which slightly sucks because its a totally good site for skip tracking moronic debtors who post where they work and how much they make on their page...oh well...I heard that they fired a girl from here who all she did was chat on IM with her friends...and they wondered why they were so far behind over there.

This weekend I think I am getting more Nero Wolfe from netflix....I will most likely spend most of Saturday converting for my ipod....

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one of those days

Do you ever have one of those days where you wish you could make someones life easier or wave that magic wand and take all the pain and crap out of their lives? Ah perfection! Look! Ta-da and you are happy! yeah...it doesnt ever really work that way...what is the biggest bummer is when someone you care about is having a shitty time of it and they are 821 miles away....(according to mapquest)...now Im sure I could drive 13 hours to visit someone, give them a hug and say "its gonna be OK mate" but in the real world...I cant drive 13 hours to visit and try to distract someone from their life. It is a total wicked pisser.
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work etc..

So once again today we are at 50% staff. As far as I know, people
may or may not have called in...who knows....its all loosy goosy
around here. A co-worker said that around here, in his opinion, when
they don't expect anything of you at all, and you do even the
slightest thing right, you are praised like the next coming of christ,
if you are a decent or exceptional worker and you make one mistake,
its pretty much the end of the world and you should never expect
praise for being a good employee. I wonder if this is true
everywhere...it pretty much has been in my estimation from my work
experience...The thing I just can't figure out is how to get in the
ivory tower of employees where you can be a complete fuckoff and still
keep your job...Based on my work experience I would say its not a
lock to me a female or a minority, although it certainly helps...In
the few jobs I have had the people that have taken full advantage of
the system have been some form of "minority" grouping (whether that
means race or creed or color or sex)...

first job ever at M&I Bank, a chick that worked there had 4 kids
(by 4 different baby daddies) and liked to drink...hard...at least 2
times a week (if not more) she "couldnt come in, my kids are sick, my
kids dont have a babysitter, my kids got up late." It started my
hatred for people who use their kids as an excuse for their own shitty
behaviour. My 2nd real job at GE...1 guy who used his kid (who didnt
even live with him full time) as a almost DAILY excuse for his
lateness, sickness, leaving earlyness...His son had more missed
busses, trips to the hospital and mysterious Monday Morning/Friday
Afternoon sicknesses than anyone I have ever met. He said (and I am
quoting here) "let them try and fire me, I will have my attorney slap
a law suit on them for racial discrimination so fast it will make your
head spin." as far as I know, he still works there...and still pulls
the same shit....

Then there was the college age girl who would (loudly) proclaim
about her intentions to drink herself floating on Thursday nites (and
thus would be "sick" on fridays) and would also detail at length the
raves and parties she would attend over the weekend (thus mysteriously
would be sick Mondays) and pulled this shit weekly for at least a
year...Then she changed her work hours so she would (supposedly) leave
at 6pm, however, when her boss left around 4:40, she would just leave
around 5pm and get paid for the extra hour...(we didnt punch a clock
there). They did end up firing her, but it wasnt for shit like that.
No it was because there was an all company meeting that we had to
attend and she didnt show up for it, and claimed she was at work
during that time, but her boss was calling her work phone every 10 min
for about 2 hours and she never picked up the line...she just wasnt
sober enough to talk her way outta that one...

The job I had after GE wasnt so bad as far as people pulling this
crap...my boss (at the time) had a really low tolerance for bull shit
like this and ended up firing a lot of people while i was there...I
think the year I was there at least 3-5 people were canned...For a
company that only has 20 or so employees, thats alot. I wouldnt say
there werent people there that bitched about special treatment for
certain employees, but when those employees are related to other
employees...well, lets just say, you dont fire your kid....

I want to be the person that can willingly use my kids as an
excuse for staying home and staying in bed. I want to call in sick
and then go to Disneyworld for the weekend. I want to lie to my boss
about my mysterious alcoholic illnessess, even though I'm not an
alcoholic....I want to smoke 2 packs a day and wonder why I have
mysterious bronchial infections, and stomach pains...but wait, I have
kids to feed and bills to pay...crap...The main question I always have
with co-workers that treat their job as a vacation spot (come and go
as you please) is how do you afford your rock and roll lifestyle when
you arent getting paid for being here?

Bah.


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freaking work, i tell ya...

So today marks the 2 week mark that one of my co-workers has been sick. (let me clarify) sick=i can not come to work but i am well enough to not be at home during the day when work calls and i am well enough to go to the bars at night and i am well enough to go to a rock concert, but i am so very ill that I can not come to work....then another coworker decides whats good for the goose is good for the gander and SHE is not coming to work either...(cause my tummy hurts, wait a minute, i need to go smoke another cigarette...) so its basically me and my 'Mo Tom here doing the work for the department. Its so unbelieveably frustrating and argggg!!!
the sad part is for coworker #1 they cant really do anything...I mean, how do you fire or repremand someone who is "fighting" cancer? Isnt cancer just the free pass? I mean, they did fire 2 pregnant people here and got away with that....I always thought pregnancy was the free pass to acting like an ass at work....I guess not....cancer must just be the lucky card here, I dunno..
Im feeling a bit better today....Dale was sick last night (convieniently when we have 18 loads of laundry to fold and dishes and shit to do...) so nothing got accomplished...Owen had a 101.8 fever at school, now seems fine? As daycare said "we know something was wrong because he didnt want to eat.."
Fuck..How can I already be having a lousy week when its only Tuesday?
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I have had a hard weekend.

First the kids have been insane this weekend...Then last night we got about 18 inches of snow...heavy, wet, annoying snow...which was then covered by sleet, melted a bit, then pounded by rain/sleet and then more snow...I'd like to say Thank you to our neighbors KT and Roy who let Dale use their snowblower....If they hadnt we would be still shoveling...our power went out for about 2 hours (ever tried to keep 3 kids occupied for two hours in the dark?), I had to shovel my way out (again) when the plow came through 30 sec before I left to go scrounge food..(shoveling wet slush=super dooper fun (not))....the kids spent most of the afternoon in a state of mental collapse (we didnt have boots=no outside time for sad kids...)..one of my friends is having a pisser of a weekend so I'm bummed for him...and to cap it all off, Malinda decided to puke apple crisp chips, apple slices and grape juice all over my nice off white carpeting....picking up chunks of vomit apples sucks. I now have a headache and a backache and the only thing keeping me going is the fact that tonite is the Oscars & BSG.

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sad

Listening to "fake plastic trees", "I know its over", and "something i can never have" all back to back while writing an email to someone on the demise of their relationships can serve no other purpose but to render you immoble and depressed. Don't do it to yourself.
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PRICELESS

THIS KILLS ME

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OWEN AGE 1

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MYA EARLY SPRING 2006 DADDYS SPECIAL SMILE

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MALINDA EARLY SPRING, NO BOO BOO

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MALINDA EARLY 2006...MEXICO DRESS

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MYA SPRING 2005 (BOO BOO AND ALL)

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DALE & I CHRISTMAS 2003

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THE GIRLS, DAY 7

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DALE AND THE GIRLS CIRCA JULY 2004

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PURPLE GIRLS

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sorry about this week

I have been busy and not much time for posting about the week. I suck. This week has been short due to vacation Monday...The wedding in DC was nice...Bryce and Carla should be in Amsterdam by now for their honeymoon...have fun in the red light dist. my dears!

The kids have been pretty good this week, for this I am greatful. As for me? I am pretty close (maybe 1-2 nights of 1-2 hours)....of finishing my cross stitch...that should be good...I was going to write a long missive tonite and then i called Ryan and got sidetracked so if you want to know whats been going on with him, call him and check in.
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sad times

Darwin Wept

Excerpted from the New York Times, February 19, 2007:

The American Civil Liberties Union, the People for the American Way Foundation and a partner from a large Manhattan law firm stood beside the student, Matthew LaClair, as he and his family threatened to sue the Kearny Board of Education if their complaints are not resolved. Last fall, Matthew, 16, taped the teacher, David Paszkiewicz, telling students in a history class that if they do not believe that Jesus died for their sins, they “belong in hell.”

On the recordings, which Matthew made surreptitiously starting in September, Mr. Paszkiewicz is heard telling the class that there were dinosaurs aboard Noah’s ark and that there is no scientific basis for evolution or the Big Bang theory of the origin of the universe.

Since Matthew turned over the tapes to school officials, his family and supporters said, he has been the target of harassment and a death threat from fellow students and “retaliation” by school officials who have treated him, not the teacher, as the problem. The retaliation, they say, includes the district’s policy banning students from recording what is said in class without a teacher’s permission and officials’ refusal to punish students who have harassed Matthew.
Matthew and his parents, Paul and Debra LaClair, are demanding an apology to Matthew and public correction of some of Mr. Paszkiewicz’s statements in class.

For his part, Matthew said he recognized that “there are going to be a lot of consequences” at school from the Monday news conference. He said he had already felt hostility from students after the school switched his history class from Mr. Paszkiewicz to another teacher.

The district would not disclose what action it had taken against Mr. Paszkiewicz, who is teaching the same course to a different group of students. He has taught in the district for 14 years.
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ME AND JEFFERSON...HANGIN IN DC

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dAD AND oWEN

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Could I be more depressed, yet happy?

So I believe I have chronicaled here my adventures with myspace and me connecting online with someone I went to high school with 12 years ago who admitted he had a crush on me back in the day. That made me feel awesome for about a week. Its always nice to know that someone found you pretty and a good ego boost no matter how you look at it. Now, that same thing that made me happy and boosted for a week has turned the corner into a real bummer. Now as I type this I can almost hear someone saying in their head the same thing they say when they hear that Britney Spears says she drinks, parties, and shows her mommy hole to us all, because she is sooooo sad. "Oh boo-fucking hoo poor you and your crappy problems." And I do realize that this "I am so pretty everyone loves me" problem is really stupid and you have complete freedom to kick me next time you see me...anyways..

I have turned the corner from feeling very happy and blushy, to being sad....I'm not sad because I bemoan my lost youth or anything, I have no desire to go redo high school and correct mistakes ala Peggy Sue Got Married (because if Hollywood has taught us nothing its that, that never works anyways, you always end up where you were anyways)..but this week yet another guy I went to high school with mentioned something to the effect that "I know you are married now but I would have followed you anywhere." Well Damn.

Now this person (vs the 1st person) dated my (then) best friend for a time, and I never was the girl to mack on her friends' men after the fact, so never really considered him in "that way"..but damn. The depressing part of this is that I feel like the worlds biggest fucking moron ever because during this time period in high school I was beyond wrapped up in my (then) boyfriend (not Dale) for pretty much the entirety of my 3 years in high school (and some of freaking middle school) and I coulda so hit the town with either of these guys and been OK with that decision. I (much like someone else around here) coulda been the #1 lovegirl in my particular postal district. I feel like Janenne Garafolio in Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion, "THAT'S Sandy Frink? What the fuck was I thinking?" ( I was hung up like a picture on THAT guy? What the fuck was I thinking?) It's only depressing in the way that you start thinking "what the hell else did I miss out on?" Once you start thinking like that, you are totally sunk

The positive part of my whole unhealthy union with THAT guy was that as a direct result of my major league temper tantrum circa 1994, I started dating Dale and have pretty much been with him since that point. Shows that from all shit piles, a diamond can be found I suppose.

Now I am wondering with each new "I totally remember going to high school with that guy, lets send a friend request" am I gonna get some form of this letter back (aww too bad you were so hung up on whatshisdickface, i worshiped your size 9 feet and now I own a mansion and a yacht) from people?

Either way its been fun to catch up with people I havent seen or thought about in years and check in how howzit going. If you believe the media Myspace is nothing but pederasts and underage girls bitching about other underage girls. For me, its my own personal "if you were in 11th grade right now you'd be hittin' it up style" site. I think I should get dale to get a page so he can find out how many girls LOOOOOVED him when he was in high school? That would totally be interesting.
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happy looooove day

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!
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Happy love day

disgusting cuteness

while watching pirates of the carribean with the kids...during the sword fight with will and cap'n jack Owen was overheard to yell at the TV "no! no! stop it! you are naughty, naughty! stop, stop it!" beyond precious.
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Everyone

the arms race...

So the theme tonite is the cold war...and who do ya like America or Russia...I am finding myself in the position of being Switzerland and being neutral...I am Sweden, Paraguay,
Lichtenstein, Monaco, Andorra. I am Turkey, Nepal, Afghanistan, Yemen, Bhutan, Spain, Portugal, Ireland..who the hell wants to be Bhutan? It hard being neutral because generally in a war, everyone wants you to, needs to you, take a side. It is pretty much validation for the "right" ness of their position, regardless of reality.

It's hard to be a neutral party because you want to please everyone and end up pleasing no one. In the wars it's always the neutral party that gets fuck-ee-fuckeed...Look at WWII, we bomb Japan and Germany back to the stone age and now we love 'um, we help rebuild their countries, we make them into leading superpowers....Switzerland is a big ass joke, a punchline...I need to be Iceland..

Anyways tonites post only resonates with two people...I am sending a shout out to my two pals who are having 99 problems (thanks Jay-Z) and quite possibly the worst night on record. Im trying to be supportive and helpful to both sides and after all that I have this sinking suspicion that I may have made it worse by trying to make it better, that I may end up being the scapegoat somehow and losing 1 or both friends, and thus the misery transferrence would be complete.

Plus its equally as hard when you are trying to help via IM'ing. I find my sarcasm doesnt translate well via type...I mean, shit , you dont want a "of course you should toss him off the Tallahatchee Bridge" to be taken seriously do ya? Cripes. I find that I am now gonna have problems sleeping because my brain is going to 11. Call, me if you need me you guys.
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GUESS WHO HAS A NEW HAIR DO?!

I LOST MY MIND AND SAID TO JULIE "CAN YOU GIVE ME BANGS?" HAVE I GONE MENTAL? I HAVENT HAD BANGS SINCE 6TH GRADE!

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dale and anthony munoz

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The superbowl (about 2 hrs before kickoff)

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Vince Young teaching QB camp to kids

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clinton portis, steven jackson....(sorry you didnt get to talk ryan!)

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real live football players..

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Im a Patriot. (ha!)

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Dale kicking an extra point (went left)

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superbowl pics

Dale as an Eagle
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Miami...view from the ocean

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TIRED

i AM TOO TIRED FROM BEING ON THE PLANE AND SLEEPING IN A CRAP HOTEL OVERNITE AND THEN BACK ON THE PLANE, RECAP AND PICTURES OF SUPERBOWL TO FOLLOW. I AM COLD.
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Billy Joel

Cbs tv

Go bears?

Media

Anthony munoz

rain sucks

so the forcast for today is rain rain and more freaking rain...right now i am watching rain pour into the pool, its maybe 68 degrees outside and wet wet wet....hmmm selling my tickets for 5k doesnt sound like too bad an idea now concidering we have a large flat screen TV in our hotel room..(its not HD but beggars cant be choosers). ugg, i so dont want to go sit outside in the rain all day and all night. Plus this hotel is almost 95% full of bears fans...i am getting death stares as i sit here in my peyton manning jersey. well wish me luck on this incredibly cold and rainy day.
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Superbowl day 2

So today is day 2 in Miami...Today we ate breakfast downstairs (38 bucks..what a ripoff...) and then and there i decided that we just cant spend that much money on semi-crappy food. Went and sat by the pool...the sun then peeked out and that was excellent...78 and sunny with an excellent breeze. We took the train and a bus to the stadium (located on Dan Marino Parkway) and went to the NFL Experience. This is a pretty neat event but really i think its geared towards kids aged 8-12. They have a lot of kids workshop type things...Dale and I did try to kick an extra point in the "kick, pass, block" tent...(For the record, Dale was about this close to getting in through, me? I kicked it directly into the arms of the guy shagging balls)...they have a TON of workshops...The coolest one was a bunch of kids doing QB camp with VINCE YOUNG helping them on their footwork.
As I said to Dale, wont this just Fuck these kids for getting QB coached for the rest of their lives? "IM sorry coach, I just cant do that. You see NFL Rookie of theYear Vince Young said that the pro's do it this way." It was nice watching him help the kids. There was also a booth where 4 NFL Player (Clinton Portis, Steven Jackson and 2 DEF guys who i didnt know) would call and talk to your friends for you on your cellphone....! As we stood in line and I called Ryan (cause who else would I call to talk to football players) but then we were told, yeah you gotta have a sprint phone. Bastards...so sorry Ryan, no Clinton Portis for you...I suck as a friend.
We picked up some swag, a picture of dale and I with tiki barber....mini footballs, pencils, magnets, two landyards for our tickets tomorrow...we also got to sit down and let a NFL Ref 9and I dont know his name, but he works with Ed Hochulis crew, talk about what a Ref sees and how they make calls. He had tape of calls that they had to review using instant replay and was having the audience try and make the call based on the 6 seconds or whatever of the play...It was pretty interesting hearing what they look for, how they make decisions, and how the NFL grades them. The coolest thing he said was that in most games when they are under the hood they dont get to see all the angles that the viewer at home sees....he also explained that certain games have more cameras than others...reg season non nationwide games, 6 cameras, national games (sunday nite) about 10, monday night football around 12-14 and superbowl upwards of 24...
It was also cool to hear him and see him show you how they decide if a catch is a "catch" vs incomplete pass, force outs, the tuck rule, fumbles etc.. I got some cool film of him explaining what each 7 man crew does in a game. Post that at home.
The other cool part (besides free doritos and milk) was that the stadium is right next to a super walmart. This means that wife (me) said to husband (dale) hey, why dont we go BUY food vs spending another 100 bucks eating tomorrow.. We hit Walmart and they were selling the exact same crap the stadium was selling except like 50% or more cheeper. I got a long sleeve grey superbowl shirt (more on that later), dale got a bright orange shirt with "one game, one dream" in SPANISH (my idea as irony for white guy winning NFL Latino) and we each got one NFL jersey. I got Manning he got Urlacher (in homage to Dylan not being here with us). Plus food for tonite (noodle bowls, and chips and salsa + a 2 ltr of orange) and breakfast (instant oatmeal) for tomorrow. We figure that the 15 bucks we spent on food was way better than the 200.00 we would have had to spend here at "Gouge um Central" (ie the hotel). So we had dinner in bed watching ESPN classic football on TV.
Back to the walmart, we bailed (and if we wouldnt have went into the garden center to see Tony Siragoosa, Moose and 2 other fox annoucers-we woulda made an earlier bus)...the bus we did catch was over 57 min late (i called the bus co to check) and thus we missed our 4:10 train...the next train after that was 6:10...by this time (4ish) it went from sunny to cold and windy and thank god i bought the long sleeve shirt! I also had a book so the 3 hours we sat outside waiting for various busses and trains was not all wasted.
Miami makes me sad as all we seem to see as we are traveling is run down auto repair, auto salvage, scrap yards, horrible small crappy houses in really poor neighborhoods, or row after row of unidentifiable buildings with tons of graffiti on them. We also seemed to encounter alot of mentally unstable people...like the kid on the bus who tried to explain to Dale that Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg saw him play football one time and he would be playing in the superbowl tomorrow because he was gonna get there with Snoop Doggs help. And the guy who was waiting for a train and kept hitting himself in the head and shooting imaginary "J's" and then hitting imaginary baseballs. Sad.
We also met some really nice people. The guy in the Wilson (official maker of NFL balls) tent who remarked "Green Bay Packers huh?" (me) "yes, Im from wisconsin" (him) "You're wearing that hat to try and get in a flight with a Bears fan arent you?" (me) "yes, yes I am."...the checkout lady at Walmart was super nice and chatty, and the nice cop (and there are about 7000000 cops out everywhere) who got out of her car to stop all traffic so dale and i could cross the street and get to our hotel (there are no cross walks anywhere!)..
Tomorrow is Game day. I think in the morning we may just sit by the pool, relax and eat oatmeal. The game is at 6:30 so i think we may get to the stadium around 3ish? I cant wait to see Billy Joel and Prince.
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Stadium

Miami

Golf

View out my window

Ah MIami! Day One.

For those who wonder: I am down in Miami...At home it is 7 above 0, here it is a cool and crisp 88 degrees :) The flight was uneventful (watched Battlestar on the ipod and was groggy due to the drugs...Checked in the beautiful Wyndham Miami Airport Hotel...ate dinner, bought two drinks at the bar (total cost 23.00 for the drinks..insane) and plan on snuggling down with Dale in our massive King Size, comfy sheets and comforter bed to celebrate our 5th anniversary (today) by watching TV and falling asleep as I am a bit jet lagged. Tomorrow we have our NFL Experience tickets....plan on being at the stadium all day...or at least part. We also have the option to head to Dolphin Mall, South Beach or (my preference) sitting by the pool next to the Tiki Bar (if I see the mighty beach house Tiki God Ill let you all know.) Right now I am buzzing on my 95% Grey Goose 2% Cranberry and 3% ice drink and Dale is sitting next to me trying to map out how we even get to the stadium using light rail and bus. watch for us on TV, we are on the Colts side of the field one section off the end zone (sec 407, row 1) we're wearing our packer hats! The crazy thing about our hotel is right behind me is an authorized NFL dealer hawking NFL merch. They had at least one booth at every airport (even detroit) with superbowl stuff..
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Goodbye!

Off to Miami...Ryan, tried to get a hold of you tonite-work was unreal......Have a good weekend everyone and GO COLTS!
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